First Feelings

just can’t get to sleep.  There’s too much going on in my head.   I’M SO FUCKING MAD.  I want to explode all over everyone.  All you lousy sons of bitches that did this to me.  You mother fuckers.  Yeah you, Mommy, Daddy, El****, M***, the agency.  Every single one of you,  HOW COULD YOU.   5 fucking days old, you pricks hand your kid over to total strangers with a hope and a prayer that everything will be OK?  Really? 

Oh, and you kept the other kids.  I guess they were OK, only I was the one you had to get rid of, like a litter of kittens.  At least the kittens get to stay with their mother until they’re weaned.  Civilization sucks.  What civilized society does this to their most helpless, vulnerable , innocent members.  Barbarian bastards that’s who. 


FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU.

I could fill a whole page, hell 1000 pages and that still wouldn’t be enough.  , you heartless fuck heads. 


I  blame my adopters too.  The ones who never acknowledged my heartbreaking loss.  You don’t have another mother.  LIES AND DECEIT.  Who was that supposed to help, surely not me, lost and alone.  Dependant upon the kindness of strangers.  What a fucked up way to go through life. 


How I cried for you, how I longed for you, how I hated you. 

This is the truth spilling out.  I’ve been lying. 


YOU LEFT ME ALONE!!  YOU LEFT ME!!

WHAT DID I DO WRONG??   When are you coming back for me? Oh yeah, never. 


So now I found you, what the fuck did you expect?   I can never be fixed.  You degenerate bastards. 



Yours truly,

Whoever the fuck I am